When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm too high and old for this...
Never let your siblings swipe right.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize