At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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