I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics