You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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