Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
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