I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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