you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
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for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
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Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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