She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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