I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize