I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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