do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
