I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.