we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS