Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize