i permit you to call me
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
