TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
