There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize