sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
