Only a mothe r could love this liver
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The struggles of a small town man whore
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
