toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize