Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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