What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
