"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
