i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize