I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize