Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
