i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
