R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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