Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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