well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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