we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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