Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
