I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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