forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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