I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
oh god the rape fog is back!
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
