New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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