I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
