she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
