I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
i think i have two assholes
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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