Texts From Last Night

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  (213): View more from California

  those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later

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  (213): those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later http://tfl.nu/envj
  Replies (9) Good night (6238) Bad night (645)
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  (760): View more from California

  i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.

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  (760): i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel. http://tfl.nu/n5cq
  Replies (177) Good night (5177) Bad night (5011)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Did we have sex?

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left

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  (706): Did we have sex? (1-706): No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left http://tfl.nu/lup5
  Replies (24) Good night (731) Bad night (5248)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...

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  (920): He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of... http://tfl.nu/1eiy
  Replies (14) Good night (1160) Bad night (4398)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.

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  (813): I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized. http://tfl.nu/p6rg
  Replies (11) Good night (1011) Bad night (3467)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog

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  (908): you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog http://tfl.nu/njtd
  Replies (6) Good night (1332) Bad night (3073)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.

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  (709): She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up. http://tfl.nu/j6op
  Replies (8) Good night (3214) Bad night (1133)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?

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  (403): All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for? http://tfl.nu/dlqr
  Replies (22) Good night (3775) Bad night (649)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G

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  (503): I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G http://tfl.nu/pzjk
  Replies (5) Good night (1816) Bad night (579)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.

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  (715): I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night. http://tfl.nu/5yhi
  Replies (6) Good night (609) Bad night (1419)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.

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  (610): I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real. http://tfl.nu/qhs0
  Replies (8) Good night (601) Bad night (1212)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.

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  (+44): Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection. http://tfl.nu/1vl5
  Replies (9) Good night (895) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked

  (539): View more from

  All of it

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  (727): What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked (539): All of it http://tfl.nu/fe2w
  Replies (5) Good night (709) Bad night (439)
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  (418): View more from Quebec

  Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?

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  (418): Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me? http://tfl.nu/ltm0
  Replies (4) Good night (449) Bad night (584)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.

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  (360): My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be. http://tfl.nu/3ncs
  Replies (2) Good night (352) Bad night (447)

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