Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.

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(914): View more from New York

Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?

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(973): View more from New Jersey

pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy

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21 Sketchy Drug Deals That Are Scary AF
Read it at the TFLN blog
(305): View more from Florida

She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.

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(515): View more from Iowa

then she stuck her tongue in my ass

(1-515): View more from Iowa

I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?

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(561): View more from Florida

i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.

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(914): View more from New York

He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.

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(516): View more from New York

I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner

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