I didn't shave. On purpose
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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