We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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