Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
