And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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