3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
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Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I had to cum in my sink.
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