How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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