maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
porn star boner night. come get it.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
