"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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