i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
my mouth tastes like poor choices
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
he thought i was a dude.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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