My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
