My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
