At least make sure they are 18
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.