DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.